Holding Forth

My Happiness

Since I grew tired of the chase
And search, I learned to find;
And since the wind blows in my face,
I sail with every wind.

Vademecum (a manual or guidebook – literally “go with me)

Lured by my style and tendency,
you follow and come after me?
Follow your own self faithfully -
take time – and thus you follow me.

Taken from The Gay Science by Friedrich Nietzsche

I have just started a reading Nietzsche, and I am already very much into his ideas. Many people see him as nihilistic – I don’t get that at all – though I am just beginning so maybe I am speaking too soon. Whatever, I don’t care so much, I still sticking with my thought that he was a lot more hopeful and optomistic than many people think.

I have done some background research into Nietzche and people definitely give him attention; whether honestly or ignorantly, I don’t know. I am trying to get into him with as few expectations as I can. I’m sure you hear about my mental travels.

The parents and I went skiing today, and it was again excellent. I think we are the only family in the county that runs around in tights consistently – I will try to get photographic evidence of this. I just feel so damn good when I get exercise. My mind, body, and spirit all thank me when I exercise. I do need to work on my skiing skills – I am a bit sloppy right now, but I will get through that.

I have to say my excitement is building. I have been planning for a long time to get back to traveling and it seems the plans are finally shaping up. More than anything, I have found some ways to generate money which will allow me to move about the planet without having to “work.” I think I even have a date for getting on a plane, but I am going to withhold that for a while here – I gotta get the ticket before I start mouthing off.

Last night, I hit upon a new destination/plan for travel, it would be towards the end of next summer or fall, but it could very well happen. I don’t think it would be too expensive and it would be one hell of a trip. Sorry for the lack of details, but more than anything I wanted to express the excitement I have for these opportunities. I don’t want to say too much in case my plans change (which they probably will). I change my mind publicly enough the way it is.

I hope you all are well out there in that big world. I have to say my little retreat here in Greenwood is treating me very well at the moment. The simple life is underestimated in this world – really, really think about that. There are truths there (as much as truth can exist, that is).

Big hugs all around. I am feeling warm and cuddly.

t

I want my tummy rubbed.

I am in a funky mood so I am not going to write much tonight. I will improv a poem for your enjoyment.

Layers,
Peeling, curling, chipping,
Obscured by time and complexity,
Buy in or check out?
Just drink your damn coffee.

A poem by Tim.

I crave the humans that glow with the brilliance of stars; the ones who soar with the spirit of humanity serving as a more constant and more intense compass than any religion; superseding and thereby refuting the systemic titles that hopelessly seek to define them; personalities that flood those around them like a chemical legion marching into the vessels of life bringing irrational emotions and unfettered vitality. These are the winds, providing profound breath, that save these desperate vessels from the doldrums of passivity, routine, and mediocrity. These are the souls that nurture pure man in his spectrum of vice and virtue; the ones who truly live; the ones who truly hope.

These spirits choose to fly in the face of mere definition and bring the essence of humanity to an unrelenting explosion of existence. They are not consumed, but instead the flames fertilize their substance. The licking tentacles flare, as if yielding to a giant bellows whipping and thrashing the blaze to a scorching fury that purifies the worthy; a heat that devours the longing, discontented masses as fuel in creating an even more lucid spirit.

Breath in their secondhand smoke in vain attempts of release from self-immolation; grasp for the perpetual high that sustains them. Glimpsing their ferocious passion will not liberate. Freedom of that magnitude comes only with the willingness to forsake all and burn with the emancipated lust for life in its fundamental form. Abandon logic. Renounce the external. Burn for the sake of burning.

To turn in fear from these luminous creatures will only leave one blind and blistered, a wandering waste in the streets amongst the rats; scrounging for the last crumb that has been left behind in the wake of the unadulterated holocaust.

The pursuit of this sovereignty is why I live. It is the perfect drug; the only verification I need to appease the eternal “Why?”. I seek to strike the match, expose my soul to the flames, and burn to completion with the passion and luster of being alive.

In memory of Hunter S. Thompson ~ 1937-2005.

t